[matt]

well here goes a funny story about why customers are a pain in the rear

first off, they have a little yappy dog that goes mental when im in the street, i do 28 out of the street of 30 houses, it barks the  whole day and a bit

about 3 years ago, i started doing the front of this house ( downstairs ) with WFP , the front lawn has a massive corner flower bed, full of roses and other flowers, the lawn is about 8 ft away from the window, so it makes sense to wfp, saves me walking in the flowerbed, this was fine for about 12 months, then they asked me to stand on these 6" sqaures of wood that the guy had set out, im size 11 feet, it didnt work that well

the next time i arrived, the guy come down his side path and threw these bit of wood on the drive and didnt even speak to me, so i just stood where i wanted and ignored the bits of wodd strewn down the drive, he came out and asked why i didnt use them, i said " well as you just threw them down the drive, and didnt speak to me, i thought they were just being trown out and you were tiding up", he knew he had pi    ssed me off

so the next time i arrive, i park my van, do the 2 houses next door and he jumps in his car an drives off, gate still locked, so i do the front and change him 6 quid and away i go, i call in at the end of the day and he says "if we are not in, then dont just do the front, you wll have to call back and catch us in "  : :

so the next 3 times he see's me do the next door, runs out to his car and drives off

today im accross the road

him says " hi, are you going to do ours today "
me " no, i still have this side to do, then tomorrow i will do them and then get to yours "
him " we might be out, if we are out, dont do any of it, call back some other time"
me " i will not have time to call back, i will be out of area after tomorrow "
him " oh ok, your loss "
me " i will cope "

i then walk down the road and speak to a guy who is allways out pottering around, i tell him of our discussion and he laughs, i ask whats funny
he explains the guy is punishing me, as the dog goes mad, i ask him what he means, he says he is not paying you to punish you

its only 9 quid  : : :

made me laugh

[Wayne Thomas]

"nowt as queer as folk" I just print off my terms & conditions, post it through their letterbox and wait  for the phone call

[matt]

i only stick around for the foloowing reasons

1. i must really annoy him when he see's me and his dog barks like mad

2. i do 28 out of the 30 houses in the road, so im walking past his house anyway

2. i must really really wind him up 

[cat9921]

2. i do 28 out of the 30 houses in the road, so im walking past his house anyway

If you do 28 out of 30 houses . Can you see a another window cleaner going in to that street 

You own that street matt 

[ftp]

Two days to do 28 houses? come on Matt pull your finger out, thats an afternoons work for some on here.  :
Get yourself a Harris pole.

[dai]

You always find one really miserable sad little git. I had one women that asked me not to invade her airspace with my pole, it's a 3 story hose next door, and as I lifted the pole it swung over her garden.
I asked her how far up she owned, she went into the house and her husband came out threatening to sue me if one single drop of water landed on his ground.
I had to laugh cause I was thinking of him trying to save the evidence as proof.
Anyway, I told him he was taking the Pi55 , he said he would report me for using foul and abusive language. As I didn't get arrested I guess that the police came to the same conclusion.

[jeff1]

well here goes a funny story about why customers are a pain in the rear

first off, they have a little yappy dog that goes mental when im in the street, i do 28 out of the street of 30 houses, it barks the  whole day and a bit

about 3 years ago, i started doing the front of this house ( downstairs ) with WFP , the front lawn has a massive corner flower bed, full of roses and other flowers, the lawn is about 8 ft away from the window, so it makes sense to wfp, saves me walking in the flowerbed, this was fine for about 12 months, then they asked me to stand on these 6" sqaures of wood that the guy had set out, im size 11 feet, it didnt work that well

the next time i arrived, the guy come down his side path and threw these bit of wood on the drive and didnt even speak to me, so i just stood where i wanted and ignored the bits of wodd strewn down the drive, he came out and asked why i didnt use them, i said " well as you just threw them down the drive, and didnt speak to me, i thought they were just being trown out and you were tiding up", he knew he had pi    ssed me off

so the next time i arrive, i park my van, do the 2 houses next door and he jumps in his car an drives off, gate still locked, so i do the front and change him 6 quid and away i go, i call in at the end of the day and he says "if we are not in, then dont just do the front, you wll have to call back and catch us in "  : :

so the next 3 times he see's me do the next door, runs out to his car and drives off

today im accross the road

him says " hi, are you going to do ours today "
me " no, i still have this side to do, then tomorrow i will do them and then get to yours "
him " we might be out, if we are out, dont do any of it, call back some other time"
me " i will not have time to call back, i will be out of area after tomorrow "
him " oh ok, your loss "
me " i will cope "

i then walk down the road and speak to a guy who is allways out pottering around, i tell him of our discussion and he laughs, i ask whats funny
he explains the guy is punishing me, as the dog goes mad, i ask him what he means, he says he is not paying you to punish you

its only 9 quid  : : :

made me laugh

So Matt your the fault of his uncontrollable Dog
Tell the guy you plan to report his dog to the environmental health for noise nuisance  They can be sued by them, it happened to a family down the road from me, there dog barked all day, they were warned twice and sued on the third occasion.
How on earth are you going to manage without that £9 now, your kids will starve, you won't be able to afford your mortgage, I think we better have a whip around for you.

[Paul Coleman]

You always find one really miserable sad little git. I had one women that asked me not to invade her airspace with my pole, it's a 3 story hose next door, and as I lifted the pole it swung over her garden.
I asked her how far up she owned, she went into the house and her husband came out threatening to sue me if one single drop of water landed on his ground.
I had to laugh cause I was thinking of him trying to save the evidence as proof.
Anyway, I told him he was taking the Pi55 , he said he would report me for using foul and abusive language. As I didn't get arrested I guess that the police came to the same conclusion.

Watch it mate!!  He will report you to air traffic control next.

[alanwilson]

its funny how out of hundreds and hundreds of customers we all end up talking about the bad ones!!

[Paul Coleman]

its funny how out of hundreds and hundreds of customers we all end up talking about the bad ones!!

You're right of course Alan.  I have some real gems too - quite a few in fact.

[M & C Window Cleaning]

My funny story of the day.

I'm half way through doing the top of this house (WFP) which is wall to wall glass. Old chap comes out and says: "Not worth doin' em t'day mate it's rainin.'

After I pointed out that the 'rain' was the water running off his ledges he says: "Oh sorry mate. Carry on," and dissapears back indoors.

Best of it was, the sun was shining!

[dai]

The funniest thing so far could have ended a lot differently.
I was going round the tops WFP and I spy a big dollop on the next window.
I scrub away vigorously trying to remove it, giving it loads of water.
I only then looked down and noticed I had been filling the biggest pair of rigging boots I ever saw, they had been left outside the patio door right under the sill of the window above.
I go back to do the front bottoms thinking about the best course of action.
I decided to go back and empty them and apologize when I knocked for payment.
I was too late, coming towards me was this huge builder and he wasn't smiling, I was just going to say sorry when I noticed a trail of left footprints on the concrete path. It was so funny I could have died laughing, and I mean literally, it was only the print of one foot, and the boot that matched it was in his hand, he tipped it up spilling a load of water onto the ground.
Of course me laughing had only added insult to his injury, his face was going redder by the second.
I stopped laughing long enough to apologize. I said "look mate if it will make you feel better give me a smack, but it really was an accident, I just forgot to look down, I was just coming back to say sorry when you walked round the corner." He called me a blind old sexual organ and started walking back.
I said "I really am sorry, you better check the other boot." I  could have bitten my tongue off, the guy stopped, turned round and started laughing. I was lucky, like most really big guys he was good natured at heart.
He later told me of an occasion when he had tripped over a pile of bricks when working on a scaffold.
He didn't hurt himself, but he did managed to deposit a trowel full of mortar on to his customers head as she walked passed below.
I didn't knock for payment for that clean, I had pushed my luck far enough.