[Gary Oldman]

It doesnt flow verbally or visually, the way you have put across your key points interrupt the reader, and detract from your sales message.

The tag line brings up a negative image, and you come across as slightly apologetic on some pages of the site.

On the plus side, it does reinforce your no nonsense, straightforward attitude, and it showcases other services you provide.

The main point of advertising is to create enough desire that the reader wants to know more about what you do, enough so that they contact you.




Mark

Good critique that, Davvo.  Worth listening to Slakeld.

[Small but perfectley formed]

i think your website sums you up perfect people appreciate honesty . No B S  just good old fashioned values!

[D.Salkeld_Ltd]

THANKYOU all for your opinions

Not that I liked all of them : : : :

But, the one thing I base my whole life on is:

THE TRUTH!!!

And I can accept that now you colleagues have given me your straight opinions I can see it needs a bit of tweaking here and there.

1.  "Stop pulling yourself down!!" My wife, Tracy often says that to me
       So I see that the image I have to put across needs to be positive and
       confident.

2.   Please be aware of my particular market and area I live in.
      I have lived in the Louth area for nearly 40 years.  I have been window
      cleaning for 20 years. A lot of people know me well, I clean for 3 or 4 of the
      retired teachers who taught me.  Some of the young couples I clean for now
      I used to, and still do, clean their parents and I remember them when they
      were kids.  Most of my customers happily call me David and honestly trust
      me.  I am very proud of that.

3.   The idea of the Web Site is not to generate more work or to appeal to
      commercial contracts.  It's an on-line further information for perspective
      customers to take a look at.  It will be put on all the new leaflets, on my car
      signs and all the customer stationary.  I don't intend to On-Line market it.

4.   I  am going to delete the "Local Businesses" as I was being too "nice". 
      Why should I spend ages adding other businesses to my site when they
      are not that bothered!!

Thanks again.

Edited version will be done tonight.


David

[Village Gleam]

How you've explained it is exactly how I read it. Your reaction to critissism is far better than mine, but please bear in mind that many of the comments were made flippantly and without any particular thought.

I saw it as a further attempt to be a part of the community in which you live and I  personally think that the people of lough will respect and admire you for that. Please keep the local businesses in even if some of the owners may have been offhand in their comments.Get links to any Lough websites that will have you,particularly ones about the area. People on this forum who link to other window cleaning sites are barking up the wrong tree .

There are many ways of selling, but people do like a story, and yours is a good one.

When I said you need a picture, I mean't of your face.

[frames to panes]

Looking better already think it's height and not hieght though.

[Dale Smith]

David, I agree with DJW, it looks really good now..... and I liked it the first time..

[Wayne Thomas]

Talking of websites.............is £100 cheap to advertise a Bold Faced Line Advertisement with details of my website, company name and telephone number in the Yellow Pages?. Don't want to advertise my home address to avoid cold calling salespeople and for security reasons.

[frames to panes]

David, I agree with DJW, it looks really good now..... and I liked it the first time..

Dale, did you get out today?

[D.Salkeld_Ltd]

How you've explained it is exactly how I read it. Your reaction to critissism is far better than mine, but please bear in mind that many of the comments were made flippantly and without any particular thought.

I saw it as a further attempt to be a part of the community in which you live and I  personally think that the people of lough will respect and admire you for that. Please keep the local businesses in even if some of the owners may have been offhand in their comments.Get links to any Lough websites that will have you,particularly ones about the area. People on this forum who link to other window cleaning sites are barking up the wrong tree .

There are many ways of selling, but people do like a story, and yours is a good one.

When I said you need a picture, I mean't of your face.

Thanks Mr Solubility  Exactly what I AM

David

[cvdewsbury]

THANKYOU all for your opinions

Not that I liked all of them : : : :

But, the one thing I base my whole life on is:

THE TRUTH!!!

And I can accept that now you colleagues have given me your straight opinions I can see it needs a bit of tweaking here and there.

1.  "Stop pulling yourself down!!" My wife, Tracy often says that to me
       So I see that the image I have to put across needs to be positive and
       confident.

2.   Please be aware of my particular market and area I live in.
      I have lived in the Louth area for nearly 40 years.  I have been window
      cleaning for 20 years. A lot of people know me well, I clean for 3 or 4 of the
      retired teachers who taught me.  Some of the young couples I clean for now
      I used to, and still do, clean their parents and I remember them when they
      were kids.  Most of my customers happily call me David and honestly trust
      me.  I am very proud of that.

3.   The idea of the Web Site is not to generate more work or to appeal to
      commercial contracts.  It's an on-line further information for perspective
      customers to take a look at.  It will be put on all the new leaflets, on my car
      signs and all the customer stationary.  I don't intend to On-Line market it.

4.   I  am going to delete the "Local Businesses" as I was being too "nice". 
      Why should I spend ages adding other businesses to my site when they
      are not that bothered!!

Thanks again.

Edited version will be done tonight.


David

Did you use to be a wrestler...Dave "The Truth"Salkeld

[ste k]

spell check:

"...at the time, I was single"

breeding
professional
canvassing
accessible
height

[Dale Smith]

DJW, we were out up until just gone 11, then we had no choice but to stop 

[Davo]

Thats much better david than your first one. Its easier to read and doesnt detract from the message you want to give out to your community. I find the thing with honesty is that people who abuse your trust and honesty ( because they misstake it for softness) need to be told quite firmly that the way they are trying to treat you is not acceptable, I think your terms and conditions reinforce that.


Good luck.



Mark

[brett walker]

THANKYOU all for your opinions

Not that I liked all of them : : : :

But, the one thing I base my whole life on is:

THE TRUTH!!!

And I can accept that now you colleagues have given me your straight opinions I can see it needs a bit of tweaking here and there.

1.  "Stop pulling yourself down!!" My wife, Tracy often says that to me
       So I see that the image I have to put across needs to be positive and
       confident.

2.   Please be aware of my particular market and area I live in.
      I have lived in the Louth area for nearly 40 years.  I have been window
      cleaning for 20 years. A lot of people know me well, I clean for 3 or 4 of the
      retired teachers who taught me.  Some of the young couples I clean for now
      I used to, and still do, clean their parents and I remember them when they
      were kids.  Most of my customers happily call me David and honestly trust
      me.  I am very proud of that.

3.   The idea of the Web Site is not to generate more work or to appeal to
      commercial contracts.  It's an on-line further information for perspective
      customers to take a look at.  It will be put on all the new leaflets, on my car
      signs and all the customer stationary.  I don't intend to On-Line market it.

4.   I  am going to delete the "Local Businesses" as I was being too "nice". 
      Why should I spend ages adding other businesses to my site when they
      are not that bothered!!

Thanks again.

Edited version will be done tonight.


David

  well said mate



brett

[D.Salkeld_Ltd]

spell check:

"...at the time, I was single"

breeding
professional
canvassing
accessible
height

Thanks Mate

Sorted em

[D.Salkeld_Ltd]

Thats much better david than your first one. Its easier to read and doesnt detract from the message you want to give out to your community. I find the thing with honesty is that people who abuse your trust and honesty ( because they misstake it for softness) need to be told quite firmly that the way they are trying to treat you is not acceptable, I think your terms and conditions reinforce that.


Good luck.



Mark

That's why I wanted to introduce T&C's on the other hand I didn't want to come heavy on the majority of my very good customers.

On another note.  I have added this to the bottom of my Invoices:

PAYMENT WITHIN 14 DAYS PLEASE
LATE PAYMENT MAY INCUR A £5 CHARGE

It started off as:

Prompt Payment is Appreciated

(still lazy payers :)

Then:

Payment within 14 days please

(not much change : :)

Added the £5 charge
NOW they pay up!!!

David

[gary999]

great improvement like your wfp advantages page in particular

[supernova77]

Its looking good now mate.

Well done

Andy

[matt]

i like the site

it paints a picture of a local window cleaner who is honest and does the best job he can

i think this is a good idea, afterall its easy to portray yourself as a multinational company online with the slick website etc etc, but imho the average domestic customer wants to you know are a honest guy earning a honest living, not a company who employs a different bloke every month

[Jimmy1]

Hi - Liked your site - down to earth which I think a lot of people will appreciate.

Just a couple of things:  Facias is spelt Fascias. Also where you say "Over the 20 years I have been window cleaning in Louth I have become to..." become to needs to read "come to".  "people want" would read better as "people need" "Relaible" should read "reliability"  Trustworthy should read "Trustworthiness" But it might be easier to change your wording " Over the 20 years I have been window cleaning in Louth I have become to understand what people want from a window cleaning service" to: "20 years experience in this business has given me an understanding of the qualities people require in a window cleaner:"

I would also take the also out of your phrase "We can also reach windows inaccessible by ladders" and make the words  ladders and holes smaller case in your phrase " No More Ladder holes in the lawn! so it reads "No more ladder holes in th lawn!"

I would also be tempted to use some colour on some things i.e: company name etc and would definately change the font from italic on the

"Established 20 Years
Also:
Conservatory Cleaning
Gutters, Facias etc washed

bit as it doesn't flow and tricks the eye (if you know what I mean)

I am only pointing thes things out as they are on your home page and prospective clients will see this first.

But on the plus side as Ive said I think it is down to earth and gives an impression of honesty. It'll definately do the trick mate - well done!