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dazmond

  • Posts: 23968
Re: Depression
« Reply #40 on: February 27, 2020, 06:29:35 am »
Something that I've picked up from this thread, is about not being alone.
I quite like my own company though. I know I'm part of a very close family but I need a bit of time to myself. Add my Mother-in-law coming round to ours and going to see my Dad to a busy schedule and I need some solitude.
I enjoy watching sport and listening to music (maybe some CIU) alone. Just me and my thoughts (and a few drinks).
If I was single or if my son was older it might be different.
Does anyone else feel like that they need that time alone?

of course griff.....its normal....why do you think guys that have been married for years have garages/sheds that they hide in sometimes....or some go fishing to get away........solitude is healthy as long as its not  longer than a day or two.....

although i remember going to porto santo a few years ago with the missus and there was a old guy living in the rocks on the beach.....apparently he d lived on the island all his life and decided he wanted to live out the rest of the days by the beach away from his family.....absolutely stunning views to wake up to every morning......
price higher/work harder!

dazmond

  • Posts: 23968
Re: Depression
« Reply #41 on: February 27, 2020, 07:12:23 am »
 being a self employed window cleaner has gloriously  positive benefits......

1.outdoor exercise
2.flexible

never underestimate these 2 things...imagine having to work in an office all day and not be able to go in late or knock off early when you want......

or setting an alarm clock and forcing yourself to get out of bed because if you dont you could lose your job if your late again...........that would be a nightmare for me.......
price higher/work harder!

Slacky

  • Posts: 8279
Re: Depression
« Reply #42 on: February 27, 2020, 07:21:27 am »
Does anyone else feel like that they need that time alone?

Yes, I do. But sometimes it's a fine line between solitude and isolating.

Solitude is good.

Stoots

  • Posts: 6211
Re: Depression
« Reply #43 on: February 27, 2020, 07:21:34 am »
What it all boils down to with depression. Is your thoughts.

Control your thoughts and you control your life.

Meditation in particular mindfulness helps as does the gym etc.

But the problem with most of us is that we are too busy working and dealing with life at 100 miles an hour that we don't have any time to spend on us.

I haven't been to the gym for a long time, by the time I get home I just don't have the energy. I don't eat healthy because I don't have time to cook. I don't have time for hobbies because all weekend is taken up with doing what the family wants to do. I don't have time to meditate, go get a massage etc.

The list goes on we just put out heads down and plough through life feeling like a bag of poope.

They call it the rat race, and it's true we are just racing towards our graves without taking time to reflect and really enjoy life. Its all about money, which is a pointless pursuit in itself... No wonder we are all depressed.


james peters

  • Posts: 951
Re: Depression
« Reply #44 on: February 27, 2020, 07:39:10 am »
its always good to remember
The winner of the rat race is still a rat !!!!

G Griffin

  • Posts: 40745
Re: Depression
« Reply #45 on: February 27, 2020, 08:16:49 am »
Does anyone else feel like that they need that time alone?

Yes, I do. But sometimes it's a fine line between solitude and isolating.

Solitude is good.
Good point.
There's a difference between doing it and having to do it. And I suppose the first could lead to the second.
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

G Griffin

  • Posts: 40745
Re: Depression
« Reply #46 on: February 27, 2020, 08:18:15 am »
What it all boils down to with depression. Is your thoughts.

Control your thoughts and you control your life.

Meditation in particular mindfulness helps as does the gym etc.

But the problem with most of us is that we are too busy working and dealing with life at 100 miles an hour that we don't have any time to spend on us.

I haven't been to the gym for a long time, by the time I get home I just don't have the energy. I don't eat healthy because I don't have time to cook. I don't have time for hobbies because all weekend is taken up with doing what the family wants to do. I don't have time to meditate, go get a massage etc.

The list goes on we just put out heads down and plough through life feeling like a bag of poope.

They call it the rat race, and it's true we are just racing towards our graves without taking time to reflect and really enjoy life. Its all about money, which is a pointless pursuit in itself... No wonder we are all depressed.
You have to make time, Gomo.
But I agree that too many of us don't.
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Dry Clean

  • Posts: 8858
Re: Depression
« Reply #47 on: February 27, 2020, 08:41:01 am »
Back to being serious:

A few have mentioned diet helps. What foods do you recommend or avoid? I know alcohol isn't good but what about other foods and drinks.
Saying that, I do enjoy a drink- enjoy it too much- but it doesn't affect me too much these days.
Caffeine or anything high in sugar would be best avoided, they both can give you a buzz which is then followed by a low.

Crystal-clear

  • Posts: 3029
Re: Depression
« Reply #48 on: February 27, 2020, 08:49:20 am »
Back to being serious:

A few have mentioned diet helps. What foods do you recommend or avoid? I know alcohol isn't good but what about other foods and drinks.
Saying that, I do enjoy a drink- enjoy it too much- but it doesn't affect me too much these days.
Caffeine or anything high in sugar would be best avoided, they both can give you a buzz which is then followed by a low.
That's so true.. it takes a lot of willpower because sugar is so addictive

combat1

  • Posts: 893
Re: Depression
« Reply #49 on: February 27, 2020, 10:25:34 am »
Brilliant post Gomo, my life exactly.

RPCCS

  • Posts: 973
Re: Depression
« Reply #50 on: February 27, 2020, 11:30:01 am »
What it all boils down to with depression. Is your thoughts.

Control your thoughts and you control your life.

Meditation in particular mindfulness helps as does the gym etc.

But the problem with most of us is that we are too busy working and dealing with life at 100 miles an hour that we don't have any time to spend on us.

I haven't been to the gym for a long time, by the time I get home I just don't have the energy. I don't eat healthy because I don't have time to cook. I don't have time for hobbies because all weekend is taken up with doing what the family wants to do. I don't have time to meditate, go get a massage etc.

The list goes on we just put out heads down and plough through life feeling like a bag of poope.

They call it the rat race, and it's true we are just racing towards our graves without taking time to reflect and really enjoy life. Its all about money, which is a pointless pursuit in itself... No wonder we are all depressed.
Pretty much the same here. I  am not working for myself this week as I  have no van atm. The last one was costing me so much in repairs I had enough and sold it. I did not want to make the mistake of buying in haste, so I have been waiting for the right van to turn up . I think I have found it, and will see it early next week. As many on here know, I do a bit of part time coach driving,as it alleviates the boredom of window cleaning, although in some cases it can be worse, driving for a few hours,then sitting in your a r s e for another few until it’s time to come home. So this week I have had a couple of days driving work, off for rest of the week but might have some work next week before I get the new van. This is the only time I will get to just chill, although I can’t do anything without transport unless I walk down to where the Mrs works and get the car, a mile and a half walk.
Cheers Rich

NWH

  • Posts: 16952
Re: Depression
« Reply #51 on: February 27, 2020, 01:22:49 pm »
Feel the fear and do it anyway by Susan Jeffers,read it she makes sense if it all.

dazmond

  • Posts: 23968
Re: Depression
« Reply #52 on: February 27, 2020, 02:06:18 pm »
i did a couple of hours this morning 8am-1030am....(mainly commercial jobs) then home for some early lunch then ive just had some sports physio and acupuncture for my back(he comes to your house)...great bloke and only charges £35 a session....

i feel amazing...he s really loosened up my back for me......ive now got the rest of the afternoon off to chill now.....i couldnt do that if i worked full time for someone else! :D
price higher/work harder!

dazmond

  • Posts: 23968
Re: Depression
« Reply #53 on: February 27, 2020, 02:17:05 pm »
What it all boils down to with depression. Is your thoughts.

Control your thoughts and you control your life.

Meditation in particular mindfulness helps as does the gym etc.

But the problem with most of us is that we are too busy working and dealing with life at 100 miles an hour that we don't have any time to spend on us.

I haven't been to the gym for a long time, by the time I get home I just don't have the energy. I don't eat healthy because I don't have time to cook. I don't have time for hobbies because all weekend is taken up with doing what the family wants to do. I don't have time to meditate, go get a massage etc.

The list goes on we just put out heads down and plough through life feeling like a bag of poope.

They call it the rat race, and it's true we are just racing towards our graves without taking time to reflect and really enjoy life. Its all about money, which is a pointless pursuit in itself... No wonder we are all depressed.

sounds like your looking for excuses to me.....of course you ve got time to cook  decent food and train in the gym 2 or 3 hours a week....you just dont want to.........lots of family guys go to my local gym....put it into perspective ITS 3 HOURS OF YOUR WEEK!!if you cant find 3 hours then theres something wrong.....its easy to cook healthy food once your into a routine and you know what to cook.......

one day you ll wake up and your kids will be grown up and you ll be unfit and out of shape with a bag for a belly and wonder what happened..... ;D
price higher/work harder!

deeege

  • Posts: 5008
Re: Depression
« Reply #54 on: February 27, 2020, 02:44:42 pm »
I do tend to agree with Daz about not having the time, I used that excuse myself for many years too.

I have a young family, demanding wife and a house and garden to maintain and improve aswell as my business but it’s still possible to find time for me if I make it a priority.

I’ve friends that tell me they don’t have the time to go running/gym/whatever but their kids are in bed by 8pm and they then sit and watch tv until midnight. It’s just a personal choice not to make the time really.
"....and it's lend me ten pounds, I'll buy you a drink, and mother wake me early in the morning."

Dave Willis

Re: Depression
« Reply #55 on: February 27, 2020, 04:12:21 pm »
I don’t have time to clean windows really.

Dave Willis

Re: Depression
« Reply #56 on: February 27, 2020, 04:22:49 pm »
Exercise does help but it’s not a cure. Depression (proper depression) is an illness that comes back time and time again. Most of us can be diagnosed as grumpy old twats and not proper depressives.
My local gym instructor took his own life on New Years Day at the age of 27. Lovely guy, laugh a minute, fit as a fiddle, gorgeous girlfriend and loved by all the women.
Who knows what was going on in his head?

֍Winp®oClean֍

  • Posts: 1688
Re: Depression
« Reply #57 on: February 27, 2020, 06:25:21 pm »
https://www.facebook.com/1garethwynjones/videos/1983029651821825/

Never liked this bloke until recently.  My mistake, I misjudged him big time.
Comfortably Numb!

Stoots

  • Posts: 6211
Re: Depression
« Reply #58 on: February 27, 2020, 07:21:40 pm »
What it all boils down to with depression. Is your thoughts.

Control your thoughts and you control your life.

Meditation in particular mindfulness helps as does the gym etc.

But the problem with most of us is that we are too busy working and dealing with life at 100 miles an hour that we don't have any time to spend on us.

I haven't been to the gym for a long time, by the time I get home I just don't have the energy. I don't eat healthy because I don't have time to cook. I don't have time for hobbies because all weekend is taken up with doing what the family wants to do. I don't have time to meditate, go get a massage etc.

The list goes on we just put out heads down and plough through life feeling like a bag of poope.

They call it the rat race, and it's true we are just racing towards our graves without taking time to reflect and really enjoy life. Its all about money, which is a pointless pursuit in itself... No wonder we are all depressed.

sounds like your looking for excuses to me.....of course you ve got time to cook  decent food and train in the gym 2 or 3 hours a week....you just dont want to.........lots of family guys go to my local gym....put it into perspective ITS 3 HOURS OF YOUR WEEK!!if you cant find 3 hours then theres something wrong.....its easy to cook healthy food once your into a routine and you know what to cook.......

one day you ll wake up and your kids will be grown up and you ll be unfit and out of shape with a bag for a belly and wonder what happened..... ;D

Yes but the thread is about depression.

Of course I have time to cook, exercise and look after my health.

But after a days work and all the other things I have to do I can't be arsed and don't have the energy. The reason people sit down is because they are knackered and depressed lol

dazmond

  • Posts: 23968
Re: Depression
« Reply #59 on: February 27, 2020, 07:28:48 pm »
ive just remembered a few years ago that you told us you have a heart condition adam i think?....thats probably why you re knackered after a days work at your age.......
price higher/work harder!