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Jay Le Huray

  • Posts: 647
nicknames for customers
« on: November 19, 2017, 06:56:50 am »
myself and my partner have several nicknames for some of our customers.... I'm sure other cleaners do too, here is a few.

Mrs Dim but Nice
Mrs Crumpy
Mr Coweb
Mrs Polish
Mr Chauvinist
Aunt Sally
Mr Smelly
Miss Avon
Andy The Tea Man
The Professor
Mr & Mrs Bling
Mrs Yappy Dog

there are a few more but I must refrain from typing them lol 

PHILIP HARDY

  • Posts: 189
Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #1 on: November 19, 2017, 08:47:21 am »
I Have a
Maggie Thatcher
Miss Prim
Talking Gill
Broken neck Lady
Granny Blair
Oh didnt know you were coming today -Lee
Dog sh*t Jo
Might think of some more later.
The Stupid Neither Forgive Nor Forget
The Naive Forgive And Forget
The Wise Forgive But Don't Forget

The Jester of Wibbly

  • Posts: 2160
Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #2 on: November 19, 2017, 09:12:26 am »
How about.

Miss. It this time
Mr.  Bit
Mr. Payment

 ;D
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Walter Mitty

  • Posts: 1314
Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #3 on: November 19, 2017, 10:02:49 am »
Not so much for people but I've had a few for places.
An ex-job of mine I knew as "dog sh*t alley". I thought of one customer as Mr Unilateral, because he used the word - a lot :)

Og

Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #4 on: November 19, 2017, 10:17:25 am »
My favourite is

Mr sultana corduroy

nathankaye

  • Posts: 5366
Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #5 on: November 19, 2017, 10:17:37 am »

Driving instructor
Frenchy  (no, not for that but she has a 2nd home in france)
Dr's
Hunchback
Cameltoe  (yes for that!
facebook.com/1NKServices
1NKServices.co.uk

Johnny B

  • Posts: 2385
Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #6 on: November 19, 2017, 10:30:01 am »
I remember one customer I had in the UK. She was a widow, nice enough as a person but always had something to complain about. Her general demeanor was one of negativity, so my nickname for her was Mrs Half-Empty.

John
Being diplomatic is being able to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.

Miko67

  • Posts: 86
Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #7 on: November 19, 2017, 10:55:40 am »
Haha great thread.
I got one woman I sacked and took back a few times, but she kept being nice at last minute and giving me extra etc.
Her name was moany-Lisa.
Sacked her for good last week after going to Bacs and she still couldn't pay.  Sometimes your best leaving the dross where it belongs !!
Moany Lisa, who feckin needs one of them

Shrek

  • Posts: 3931
Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #8 on: November 19, 2017, 12:15:03 pm »
Dog S@#t Pete
Dog s@#t Ali
Dog s@#t Sean

All of which are now ex customers  ;D

windowswashed

  • Posts: 2577
Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #9 on: November 19, 2017, 12:17:01 pm »
Only got three names:
BP - bad payer (collect & drop)
FB - Funny person (not in a good way)
Dodgy -  (gut feeling trouble)

The rest have no nicknames, happy with the rest  :)

capn sparkle

  • Posts: 567
Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #10 on: November 19, 2017, 02:19:31 pm »
Only ever named one - The Willy Waggler

Slippers, V neck jumper, untold amounts of dandruff, very sweaty looking and in his 40's still living with his wheelchair bound mum in a bungalow and obviously never worked in his life.

Back in the day when traditional I was soaping up a large frosted window and was convinced that the custie performed some sort of strange dance in the hallway! Something seemed wrong but I couldn't put my finger on it.  6 weeks later, cleaned the front and popped round the side to the frosted one, soaped it up then went straight to the back where I could look down the hallway. There stood my now ex custie with his jeans and pants round his ankles jiggling about for all his worth glancing into the front room to check mum can't see him.

I believe the phrase 'Babies arm holding an orange' would be suitable to describe what I saw, the only saving grace being that he wasn't stood to attention. And yes I did finish the bungalow, got paid and never went back, although the muppet rang me 7-8 weeks later see why I hadn't cleaned and couldn't understand why I no longer wished to clean 'due' to his dancing.

 

robbo333

  • Posts: 2419
Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #11 on: November 19, 2017, 03:58:54 pm »
I have a few names for the odd customer but decorum prevents me repeating it on here!  ;D
"Thank you for calling: if you have a 1st floor flat, mid terraced house, lots of dogs, no parking, no side access, or no sense of humour, please press hold!
For all other enquiries, please press1"

Phil J

  • Posts: 638
Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #12 on: November 19, 2017, 07:18:47 pm »
My top three, in no particular order:
Racist Archie
Smokey Joe
MILF Filth

Stoots

  • Posts: 6211
Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #13 on: November 19, 2017, 07:24:18 pm »
awkward lovely
lovely
old lovely
miserable lovely
not that lovely lovely again
argh that lovely
ya husbands a lovely lady


Steve Newres

Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #14 on: November 19, 2017, 07:58:01 pm »

If I was you I'd quickly edit that or you'll be banned for sure.

Stoots

  • Posts: 6211
Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #15 on: November 19, 2017, 09:13:05 pm »

If I was you I'd quickly edit that or you'll be banned for sure.

 ;D

Jay Le Huray

  • Posts: 647
Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #16 on: November 20, 2017, 07:20:23 am »
another one I have just remembered
Mr Naked......

he would answer the door in just a dressing gown that was always wide open for all to see.... yuk

jo5hm4n

  • Posts: 948
Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #17 on: November 20, 2017, 12:47:43 pm »
Customer called carol opened the door today in nothing but a towel wrapped round her.

From this day on she will be known as

Towel Carol

capn sparkle

  • Posts: 567
Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #18 on: November 20, 2017, 04:54:19 pm »
Customer called carol opened the door today in nothing but a towel wrapped round her.

From this day on she will be known as

Towel Carol


If only a few more weeks had passed eh! Xmas Carol   ;D ;D ;D

Marc Stock

Re: nicknames for customers
« Reply #19 on: November 21, 2017, 10:05:09 am »
Mine was the love doctor.

Way back i was canvassing and i called on a lady to ask if she wanted a window cleaner.

She said 'oh no thanks there is no way my husband would ever pay to have the windows cleaned...hes a tight g**.

So i said do you know of Lee Evans. Puzzled...."yes" she said.  Well look up ypu tube sexy sat navs, there is a bit on how to get your husband to do whatever you want him to do..
https://youtu.be/pEHrR_zjdXc

So anyway i thought that was it and was just making a bad call funnier.

Anyway 3 days later i get an enquiry...its the husband of the same lady i called on and booked him in. He seemed very happy to have his windows cleaned...and as he was a GP we called him the love doctor.