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Lee Burbidge

  • Posts: 2287
Newbies
« on: May 23, 2016, 07:39:53 am »
Thought you might like this Newbie cartoon.

When you started out what were your Eureka moments..... maybe you were struggling on cleaning vents with a wfp, then one day you just got it.... maybe it was spotting issues. What is the silliest newbie thing you have heard?

Ian101

  • Posts: 7887
Re: Newbies
« Reply #1 on: May 23, 2016, 08:37:48 am »
joining a guild

Lee Burbidge

  • Posts: 2287
Re: Newbies
« Reply #2 on: May 23, 2016, 08:47:12 am »

8weekly

Re: Newbies
« Reply #3 on: May 23, 2016, 09:06:25 am »

Arnold Palmer

  • Posts: 20793
Re: Newbies
« Reply #4 on: May 23, 2016, 10:52:04 am »
#aliens

Lee Burbidge

  • Posts: 2287
Re: Newbies
« Reply #5 on: May 23, 2016, 01:45:23 pm »
joining a guild

Troll alert

Subscribing to window cleaning magazine.

You dont need to subscribe, its free.
www.windowcleaningmagazine.co.uk
A lot of work goes into it :)

Ian Lancaster

  • Posts: 2811
Re: Newbies
« Reply #6 on: May 23, 2016, 01:51:14 pm »
Circa 1968:

Living in a boatyard near Rochester.

Just been sacked from my job (again).  Bloke on the next boat is a window cleaner doing schools for the Inner London Education Authority.  (All old Victorian "3-decker" buildings - ceilings 12 foot high and an art room perched on top of the highest floor).  He offers to take me with him, it's all price work, you get paid a fixed sum for every job you do.

Arrive on the first job, it looks like a skyscraper to me :o  Up the inside staircase carrying our 'coms' (short double window cleaners ladders), buckets - swabs (no 'T' bars yet) - squeegees - scrim and bird s**t scrapers.  Arrive in the art room, 4 (very) high floors above ground.  He shows me how to wash and wring out a scrim, then puts his 'com' up against the side window frame.  Each window is two sashes of six panes, about 3 feet square with a fanlight slightly smaller above.  He hangs his scrim over his shoulder, sticks his squeegee in a holster on his belt, wrings the excess water out of his swab then climbs up the ladder.  Puts one foot on the sill and starting at the top of the fanlight he cleans all the insides.

Then he pulls the upper (outside) sash down till it's level with the lower one.  Then he climbs up and puts both feet on the narrow platform where the two sashes are side by side.  He grabs the wooden bar between the main window opening and the fanlight with his free hand and ducks under the bar.

Now he's standing on the upper edges of the sashes with his body outside, just hanging on with one hand.  With the other he cleans the outside of the fanlight.  Then he bends down and grips the tops of the sashes with both hands and drops down onto the sill.  Now he's standing on the sill (outside, 4 floors up  :o)  He pulls the bottom (inner sash) up until it's far enough for him to clean the top row of panes, then he pushes it down again. THEN HE PULLS UP THE OUTER SASH TILL IT'S AT THE TOP  :o :o :o.

Now he's standing on the outside sill with the window closed, just hanging on with his fingers in the channel that the sash runs in.  With his free hand he cleans the outside of the upper sash.  Then he bends down pulls the bottom sash up again so he can grab hold of the bottom frame.  With his free hand he cleans the lower row of panes, then he pulls the lower sash further up, ducks under it and climbs back inside.

He looks at me, all unconcerned and says:  "OK, you do the next one.............."

Lee Burbidge

  • Posts: 2287
Re: Newbies
« Reply #7 on: May 23, 2016, 02:37:40 pm »
Circa 1968:

Living in a boatyard near Rochester.

Just been sacked from my job (again).  Bloke on the next boat is a window cleaner doing schools for the Inner London Education Authority.  (All old Victorian "3-decker" buildings - ceilings 12 foot high and an art room perched on top of the highest floor).  He offers to take me with him, it's all price work, you get paid a fixed sum for every job you do.

Arrive on the first job, it looks like a skyscraper to me :o  Up the inside staircase carrying our 'coms' (short double window cleaners ladders), buckets - swabs (no 'T' bars yet) - squeegees - scrim and bird s**t scrapers.  Arrive in the art room, 4 (very) high floors above ground.  He shows me how to wash and wring out a scrim, then puts his 'com' up against the side window frame.  Each window is two sashes of six panes, about 3 feet square with a fanlight slightly smaller above.  He hangs his scrim over his shoulder, sticks his squeegee in a holster on his belt, wrings the excess water out of his swab then climbs up the ladder.  Puts one foot on the sill and starting at the top of the fanlight he cleans all the insides.

Then he pulls the upper (outside) sash down till it's level with the lower one.  Then he climbs up and puts both feet on the narrow platform where the two sashes are side by side.  He grabs the wooden bar between the main window opening and the fanlight with his free hand and ducks under the bar.

Now he's standing on the upper edges of the sashes with his body outside, just hanging on with one hand.  With the other he cleans the outside of the fanlight.  Then he bends down and grips the tops of the sashes with both hands and drops down onto the sill.  Now he's standing on the sill (outside, 4 floors up  :o)  He pulls the bottom (inner sash) up until it's far enough for him to clean the top row of panes, then he pushes it down again. THEN HE PULLS UP THE OUTER SASH TILL IT'S AT THE TOP  :o :o :o.

Now he's standing on the outside sill with the window closed, just hanging on with his fingers in the channel that the sash runs in.  With his free hand he cleans the outside of the upper sash.  Then he bends down pulls the bottom sash up again so he can grab hold of the bottom frame.  With his free hand he cleans the lower row of panes, then he pulls the lower sash further up, ducks under it and climbs back inside.

He looks at me, all unconcerned and says:  "OK, you do the next one.............."

That's a lovely story Ian :)

simonr

  • Posts: 1215
Re: Newbies
« Reply #8 on: May 23, 2016, 03:58:39 pm »
 ;D brilliant

Ian101

  • Posts: 7887
Re: Newbies
« Reply #9 on: May 23, 2016, 05:45:56 pm »
joining a guild

Troll alert

ha ha pmsl first time ive ever been called a troll  :)  btw was meant as a joke

chris turner

  • Posts: 1492
Re: Newbies
« Reply #10 on: May 23, 2016, 06:19:45 pm »
Circa 1968:

Living in a boatyard near Rochester.

Just been sacked from my job (again).  Bloke on the next boat is a window cleaner doing schools for the Inner London Education Authority.  (All old Victorian "3-decker" buildings - ceilings 12 foot high and an art room perched on top of the highest floor).  He offers to take me with him, it's all price work, you get paid a fixed sum for every job you do.

Arrive on the first job, it looks like a skyscraper to me :o  Up the inside staircase carrying our 'coms' (short double window cleaners ladders), buckets - swabs (no 'T' bars yet) - squeegees - scrim and bird s**t scrapers.  Arrive in the art room, 4 (very) high floors above ground.  He shows me how to wash and wring out a scrim, then puts his 'com' up against the side window frame.  Each window is two sashes of six panes, about 3 feet square with a fanlight slightly smaller above.  He hangs his scrim over his shoulder, sticks his squeegee in a holster on his belt, wrings the excess water out of his swab then climbs up the ladder.  Puts one foot on the sill and starting at the top of the fanlight he cleans all the insides.

Then he pulls the upper (outside) sash down till it's level with the lower one.  Then he climbs up and puts both feet on the narrow platform where the two sashes are side by side.  He grabs the wooden bar between the main window opening and the fanlight with his free hand and ducks under the bar.

Now he's standing on the upper edges of the sashes with his body outside, just hanging on with one hand.  With the other he cleans the outside of the fanlight.  Then he bends down and grips the tops of the sashes with both hands and drops down onto the sill.  Now he's standing on the sill (outside, 4 floors up  :o)  He pulls the bottom (inner sash) up until it's far enough for him to clean the top row of panes, then he pushes it down again. THEN HE PULLS UP THE OUTER SASH TILL IT'S AT THE TOP  :o :o :o.

Now he's standing on the outside sill with the window closed, just hanging on with his fingers in the channel that the sash runs in.  With his free hand he cleans the outside of the upper sash.  Then he bends down pulls the bottom sash up again so he can grab hold of the bottom frame.  With his free hand he cleans the lower row of panes, then he pulls the lower sash further up, ducks under it and climbs back inside.

He looks at me, all unconcerned and says:  "OK, you do the next one.............."

Did you do it?? :D

Lee Burbidge

  • Posts: 2287
Re: Newbies
« Reply #11 on: May 23, 2016, 07:32:26 pm »
Circa 1968:

Living in a boatyard near Rochester.

Just been sacked from my job (again).  Bloke on the next boat is a window cleaner doing schools for the Inner London Education Authority.  (All old Victorian "3-decker" buildings - ceilings 12 foot high and an art room perched on top of the highest floor).  He offers to take me with him, it's all price work, you get paid a fixed sum for every job you do.

Arrive on the first job, it looks like a skyscraper to me :o  Up the inside staircase carrying our 'coms' (short double window cleaners ladders), buckets - swabs (no 'T' bars yet) - squeegees - scrim and bird s**t scrapers.  Arrive in the art room, 4 (very) high floors above ground.  He shows me how to wash and wring out a scrim, then puts his 'com' up against the side window frame.  Each window is two sashes of six panes, about 3 feet square with a fanlight slightly smaller above.  He hangs his scrim over his shoulder, sticks his squeegee in a holster on his belt, wrings the excess water out of his swab then climbs up the ladder.  Puts one foot on the sill and starting at the top of the fanlight he cleans all the insides.

Then he pulls the upper (outside) sash down till it's level with the lower one.  Then he climbs up and puts both feet on the narrow platform where the two sashes are side by side.  He grabs the wooden bar between the main window opening and the fanlight with his free hand and ducks under the bar.

Now he's standing on the upper edges of the sashes with his body outside, just hanging on with one hand.  With the other he cleans the outside of the fanlight.  Then he bends down and grips the tops of the sashes with both hands and drops down onto the sill.  Now he's standing on the sill (outside, 4 floors up  :o)  He pulls the bottom (inner sash) up until it's far enough for him to clean the top row of panes, then he pushes it down again. THEN HE PULLS UP THE OUTER SASH TILL IT'S AT THE TOP  :o :o :o.

Now he's standing on the outside sill with the window closed, just hanging on with his fingers in the channel that the sash runs in.  With his free hand he cleans the outside of the upper sash.  Then he bends down pulls the bottom sash up again so he can grab hold of the bottom frame.  With his free hand he cleans the lower row of panes, then he pulls the lower sash further up, ducks under it and climbs back inside.

He looks at me, all unconcerned and says:  "OK, you do the next one.............."

Did you do it?? :D

Watching......

Ian Lancaster

  • Posts: 2811
Re: Newbies
« Reply #12 on: May 23, 2016, 08:03:42 pm »
Of course ;D

There was a sort of 'rite of passage' for all 'tumblers' to pass.  You couldn't chicken out and expect to be kept on the crew.  I was absolutely terrified the first time, but I had to do it - if I hadn't the whole firm would have known and I wouldn't have been able to go back again.  You weren't allowed to show it if you hurt yourself either - it had to be made into some sort of joke.  My mentor, cleaning the insides, put his hand through a pane of glass once (the schoolkeeper had replaced a broken one with 'picture glass' - very thin glass intended for picture framing) - it broke as soon as he put his swab on it.  As he withdrew his hand the jagged glass ripped into his flesh.  The crew member on the floor below yelled: "I've just fckunig cleaned these winders. Stop fckunig bleedin' all over 'em"

"Jumping" - the practice of cleaning the upper floor outsides by climbing out or any other means you could devise - was the standard.  We never used ladders, except for high inside windows and the ground floor outsides - for these laddering took less effort than "jumping".  My mentor's career came to an end when he tried to stand on a first floor window sill that had a 45 degree slope - his feet slipped and he fell 14 feet onto the walkway below, missing a patch of lawn by a couple of feet.  As he lay there crippled and cursing, another crew member came up and said:  "You fckunig stupid cnut, why didn't you fall on the grass?"

We weren't completely heartless, we called an ambulance for him before we went back to work.

Fast forward 10 years and I was running my own 'one man band' and cleaning a pub in Rochester.  I was using the skills I learned doing the schools in London and stepping from sill to sill as I worked my way round the first floor above the  bars.  A sill crumbled as I stood on it and I fell 18 feet onto a concrete footpath.  History repeated and I suffered the same injuries as my mentor 10 years earlier - two smashed heel bones and two broken ankle joints.

Today I still walk with a limp and I'm completely flat footed.

Didn't stop me getting back up a ladder though ;)

Lee Burbidge

  • Posts: 2287
Re: Newbies
« Reply #13 on: May 23, 2016, 11:02:17 pm »
Of course ;D

There was a sort of 'rite of passage' for all 'tumblers' to pass.  You couldn't chicken out and expect to be kept on the crew.  I was absolutely terrified the first time, but I had to do it - if I hadn't the whole firm would have known and I wouldn't have been able to go back again.  You weren't allowed to show it if you hurt yourself either - it had to be made into some sort of joke.  My mentor, cleaning the insides, put his hand through a pane of glass once (the schoolkeeper had replaced a broken one with 'picture glass' - very thin glass intended for picture framing) - it broke as soon as he put his swab on it.  As he withdrew his hand the jagged glass ripped into his flesh.  The crew member on the floor below yelled: "I've just fckunig cleaned these winders. Stop fckunig bleedin' all over 'em"

"Jumping" - the practice of cleaning the upper floor outsides by climbing out or any other means you could devise - was the standard.  We never used ladders, except for high inside windows and the ground floor outsides - for these laddering took less effort than "jumping".  My mentor's career came to an end when he tried to stand on a first floor window sill that had a 45 degree slope - his feet slipped and he fell 14 feet onto the walkway below, missing a patch of lawn by a couple of feet.  As he lay there crippled and cursing, another crew member came up and said:  "You fckunig stupid cnut, why didn't you fall on the grass?"

We weren't completely heartless, we called an ambulance for him before we went back to work.

Fast forward 10 years and I was running my own 'one man band' and cleaning a pub in Rochester.  I was using the skills I learned doing the schools in London and stepping from sill to sill as I worked my way round the first floor above the  bars.  A sill crumbled as I stood on it and I fell 18 feet onto a concrete footpath.  History repeated and I suffered the same injuries as my mentor 10 years earlier - two smashed heel bones and two broken ankle joints.

Today I still walk with a limp and I'm completely flat footed.

Didn't stop me getting back up a ladder though ;)

Ouch, Im just getting over a knee fracture

Smurf

  • Posts: 8538
Re: Newbies
« Reply #14 on: May 24, 2016, 08:29:30 pm »
Of course ;D

There was a sort of 'rite of passage' for all 'tumblers' to pass.  You couldn't chicken out and expect to be kept on the crew.  I was absolutely terrified the first time, but I had to do it - if I hadn't the whole firm would have known and I wouldn't have been able to go back again.  You weren't allowed to show it if you hurt yourself either - it had to be made into some sort of joke.  My mentor, cleaning the insides, put his hand through a pane of glass once (the schoolkeeper had replaced a broken one with 'picture glass' - very thin glass intended for picture framing) - it broke as soon as he put his swab on it.  As he withdrew his hand the jagged glass ripped into his flesh.  The crew member on the floor below yelled: "I've just fckunig cleaned these winders. Stop fckunig bleedin' all over 'em"

"Jumping" - the practice of cleaning the upper floor outsides by climbing out or any other means you could devise - was the standard.  We never used ladders, except for high inside windows and the ground floor outsides - for these laddering took less effort than "jumping".  My mentor's career came to an end when he tried to stand on a first floor window sill that had a 45 degree slope - his feet slipped and he fell 14 feet onto the walkway below, missing a patch of lawn by a couple of feet.  As he lay there crippled and cursing, another crew member came up and said:  "You fckunig stupid cnut, why didn't you fall on the grass?"

We weren't completely heartless, we called an ambulance for him before we went back to work.

Fast forward 10 years and I was running my own 'one man band' and cleaning a pub in Rochester.  I was using the skills I learned doing the schools in London and stepping from sill to sill as I worked my way round the first floor above the  bars.  A sill crumbled as I stood on it and I fell 18 feet onto a concrete footpath.  History repeated and I suffered the same injuries as my mentor 10 years earlier - two smashed heel bones and two broken ankle joints.

Today I still walk with a limp and I'm completely flat footed.

Didn't stop me getting back up a ladder though ;)

That what I call proper old school training...Oh the good old days huh!  ;D ;D
Wonder who trained this chap? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rjs1mXTWL6M

Ian Lancaster

  • Posts: 2811
Re: Newbies
« Reply #15 on: May 24, 2016, 10:48:55 pm »
That what I call proper old school training...Oh the good old days huh!   ;D ;D
Wonder who trained this chap? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rjs1mXTWL6M

Well, it wasn't anybody on the firm I worked for, no-where near fast enough ;D

Smurf

  • Posts: 8538
Re: Newbies
« Reply #16 on: May 24, 2016, 11:33:18 pm »
That what I call proper old school training...Oh the good old days huh!   ;D ;D
Wonder who trained this chap? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rjs1mXTWL6M

Well, it wasn't anybody on the firm I worked for, no-where near fast enough ;D

 ;D ;D

Re: Newbies
« Reply #17 on: May 25, 2016, 11:00:49 am »
Realising there was such a thing as a professional window cleaner and that they had an internet forum where they would talk about the same subjects over and over and over and over and ..................... :D

Arnold Palmer

  • Posts: 20793
Re: Newbies
« Reply #18 on: May 25, 2016, 11:18:13 am »
Realising there was such a thing as a professional window cleaner and that they had an internet forum where they would talk about the same subjects over and over and over and over and ..................... :D

over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and 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over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and 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over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over....
#aliens

Arnold Palmer

  • Posts: 20793
Re: Newbies
« Reply #19 on: May 25, 2016, 11:25:22 am »
and over.
#aliens