[AuRavelling79]

Way back in 2008 Mrs P. paid for her and her neighbour and enclosed a note saying "I do not see why I should pay the same as No. 18 and No. 22 as they have more glass than me. Therefore I am reducing my price by £1 which I enclose."

Needless to say she has been dumped ever since and every so often I get a "hard stare" which I ignore. About 3 years ago her husband sticks his head out the window and asks "any chance of doing ours?" to which I reply "If you agree to pay the going rate and pay up the £1 you still owe me then we can discuss it." (Fat chance).

He consults with She Who Must Be Obeyed and says if you reduce your price then OK. I retort that prices have gone up and please stop wasting my time  to which he slams the window shut.

Forward to today.

I'm cleaning the upstairs windows of her adjoining neighbour and the window is flung open and Mrs. P shouts out "Oi, don't you get water on my windows I've just cleaned them!"

I ignore her. She shouts louder "Don't you get water on my windows I've just cleaned them."

Me: "No water has landed on your windows, you are just making trouble for something to do."

Her: "I've just cleaned them myself! I don't want (neighbours name) water on them - if you were any good I would have kept you on!"

Me: "Don't lie Mrs P. You might like shouting to the street but now they will hear me call you a liar and explain why - the reason I no longer clean for you is because you didn't want to pay the going rate, now leave me alone please."

Her: "Well I've got another window cleaner and he does them cheaper."

Me: "Now you are compounding the lie. You just said you'd cleaned them yourself. Either he's no good either or you are lying again. Which is it Hmmmm?"

She slams the window.

Then she comes out and makes a show of wiping her window. "And he (her neighbour whose windows I'm cleaning) got his fence paint on my fence and it's a different colour to his. And I'd just scrubbed the path and the postman came up it straight after!" 

Me: "I'm not interested Mrs P. Please let me get on."

Her: "Well it's not good enough!"

Me: "Well if all you have to worry about in life is people going about their business, life can't be too bad can it?"

Her: "Well now you're just being rude."

Me: "Look! At least no one in your household has died have they? (Her other neighbour who is a custy is a recent widow) When they have I'll give you a sympathetic ear."

Her: "Nyah! Nyah! Nyah!" And she went in and slammed the door.

 

[andyM]

When will the "Gold Memoirs" be published?
Looking forward to a good read. 

[P @ F]

I find the best Ex custies are the irate ones , better so when you still clean next door and you know the 2 still have a chin wag , makes it so much more fun when dishing out the odd freebie of a quick wipe of the fascia board cos you feel like it !   

Rich

[ChumBucket]

Should've just given her a right hook and put her on her back Gold.

[Walter Mitty]

Way back in 2008 Mrs P. paid for her and her neighbour and enclosed a note saying "I do not see why I should pay the same as No. 18 and No. 22 as they have more glass than me. Therefore I am reducing my price by £1 which I enclose."

Needless to say she has been dumped ever since and every so often I get a "hard stare" which I ignore. About 3 years ago her husband sticks his head out the window and asks "any chance of doing ours?" to which I reply "If you agree to pay the going rate and pay up the £1 you still owe me then we can discuss it." (Fat chance).

He consults with She Who Must Be Obeyed and says if you reduce your price then OK. I retort that prices have gone up and please stop wasting my time  to which he slams the window shut.

Forward to today.

I'm cleaning the upstairs windows of her adjoining neighbour and the window is flung open and Mrs. P shouts out "Oi, don't you get water on my windows I've just cleaned them!"

I ignore her. She shouts louder "Don't you get water on my windows I've just cleaned them."

Me: "No water has landed on your windows, you are just making trouble for something to do."

Her: "I've just cleaned them myself! I don't want (neighbours name) water on them - if you were any good I would have kept you on!"

Me: "Don't lie Mrs P. You might like shouting to the street but now they will hear me call you a liar and explain why - the reason I no longer clean for you is because you didn't want to pay the going rate, now leave me alone please."

Her: "Well I've got another window cleaner and he does them cheaper."

Me: "Now you are compounding the lie. You just said you'd cleaned them yourself. Either he's no good either or you are lying again. Which is it Hmmmm?"

She slams the window.

Then she comes out and makes a show of wiping her window. "And he (her neighbour whose windows I'm cleaning) got his fence paint on my fence and it's a different colour to his. And I'd just scrubbed the path and the postman came up it straight after!" 

Me: "I'm not interested Mrs P. Please let me get on."

Her: "Well it's not good enough!"

Me: "Well if all you have to worry about in life is people going about their business, life can't be too bad can it?"

Her: "Well now you're just being rude."

Me: "Look! At least no one in your household has died have they? (Her other neighbour who is a custy is a recent widow) When they have I'll give you a sympathetic ear."

Her: "Nyah! Nyah! Nyah!" And she went in and slammed the door.

 

Get yourself over to www.writingforums.com and hone your real craft.

[Smurf]

You do come across some right oddballs in this game for sure.

[nathankaye]

Yep, weve all experienced them!
Recently i put a custy‘s price up, not done so for yrs, so now its same price as neighbours (a much newer cust). Well she didnt like that and so fired me. No worries, as im the only regular reliable cleaner in area (done so for 14yrs n seen all cowboys come n go, come n go n so on n so on) just a case of waiting for em to come bk with tail between legs asking for windows to be done, lol usually for old price. Always makes me laugh. After i explain how her old price was lower as a loyal cust, but now ur a new cust n have the new going rate. Hers is most expensive one on street, doubt shes gonna leave again.         

[Johnny B]

I love it when those ex-customers who were non-payers still see me cleaning their neighbours' windows, and give me the glare!

I smile to myself with deep satisfaction that their ex-custom hasn't damaged me, my reputation or my business in the slightest. Add to that that their windows are minging, so they haven't been able to replace me  either! I've got one who is still trying to get me to come back, having not paid for a clean that I did nearly 4 years ago!

John

[EandM]

I had one with a very similar type of nuttiness - wonder if there's a standard default setting for crackpots ?