Hi
Have had some success with this problem, but it does depend greatly upon the amount of time the oil has been on the drive.
You can use a chemical readily available fom B&Q and the like made by 'Thompsons', but you need to be very careful how long it is left on the tarmac.
The 'Road Bio' is for fresh spills on road grade tarmac and would be useless on the domestic oil stained tarmac I'm afraid. They have a product designed for domestic stains but as mentioned previously, it doesn't get rid of the etching stain.
Not much help here really I'm afraid, but if the stain is not too old, you could try the 'Thompsons' product, otherwise, offer to recolour the drive for them... dead easy and good money too!
Andy