Clean It Up

UK Window Cleaning Forum => Window Cleaning Forum => Topic started by: robbo333 on March 17, 2016, 06:15:22 pm

Title: What I do say - V - What I’d like to say
Post by: robbo333 on March 17, 2016, 06:15:22 pm

I think the 'Silly Season' has started, so this is me...

I say - “No problem that you forgot to unlock your gate this morning”
I’d like to say - “I’m really glad I took the time to text you yesterday, what a f00king waste of my life that was. Do it again you’re dumped!”

I say - “Hello, you look surprised to see me, I did text you last night to say I was coming ”
I’d like to say - “Read your f00king texts for Christ sake you lazy f00ker!”

I say - “The first clean will cost a bit more because your windows are rather filthy and it will take me longer to get them cleaned to a good standard”
I’d like to say - “You filthy b@stard, you expect me to clean off 5 years of poo for no extra money, you’re having a laugh!”

I say - “No it’s ok, I don’t need to plug into your outside tap, I carry my own de-ionised water”
I’d like to say - “Have you f00king listened to anything I’ve been telling you for last 5 minutes you deaf g1t”

I say - “I’d love one, thank you, 1 sugar in mine”
I’d like to say - “Some custard creams would really slip down nicely with that!”

I say - “Thanks for the 50p tip, you shouldn’t have”
I’d like to say - “You shouldn’t have!”

I say - “You want me to move my van so you can go out now”
I’d like to say - “Could have f00king mentioned it before I f00cking started!”

I say - “I’m really sorry to hear about that”
I’d like to say - “I couldn’t give a poo about your f00king lumbago, or how many times you’ve been to the hospital this week!”

I say - “You’d like to skip this clean because they are not that dirty”
I’d like to say - “I f00king knew you’d be a waster!”

I say - “Just knocking to let you know i’m here”
I’d like to say - “If I came round the back and you had your t1ts out you’d be well p1ssed”

I say - “I’m sorry, but I’m not taking on any more work at the moment”
I’d like to say - “You seem like a complete waste of time!”

I say - “I’m sorry I don’t cover your area anymore”
I’d like to say - “Your a f00king waste of space and your dumped!”

Title: Re: What I do say - V - What I’d like to say
Post by: chris turner on March 17, 2016, 06:46:31 pm

 ;D ;D ;D
It's nice to vent, you'll sleep well tonight!

Title: Re: What I do say - V - What I’d like to say
Post by: Smurf on March 17, 2016, 07:22:57 pm

Very good  ;D

Title: Re: What I do say - V - What I’d like to say
Post by: nathankaye on March 17, 2016, 08:13:49 pm

 ;D ;D
Good job they cant read our minds. Weve all been there n well....yep, still do think that

Title: Re: What I do say - V - What I’d like to say
Post by: Matt. on March 17, 2016, 08:20:46 pm

I like it robbo  ;D

I suppose u could get a few leaflets printed up, not to many tho.

Pass them onto customers that u know will see the humour in it and hopefully they will pass them on to the p1ss t4kers for u. U never know they might start to understand we're ur coming from  ;D

Title: Re: What I do say - V - What I’d like to say
Post by: elite mike on March 17, 2016, 08:21:02 pm

 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

Title: Re: What I do say - V - What I’d like to say
Post by: robbo333 on March 17, 2016, 09:53:30 pm

Quote from: chris turner on March 17, 2016, 06:46:31 pm

;D ;D ;D
It's nice to vent, you'll sleep well tonight!

Chris you're right I just fancied a vent.

Title: Re: What I do say - V - What I’d like to say
Post by: colin bird on March 17, 2016, 10:29:34 pm

Quote from: robbo333 on March 17, 2016, 06:15:22 pm

I think the 'Silly Season' has started, so this is me...

I say - “No problem that you forgot to unlock your gate this morning”
I’d like to say - “I’m really glad I took the time to text you yesterday, what a f00king waste of my life that was. Do it again you’re dumped!”

I say - “Hello, you look surprised to see me, I did text you last night to say I was coming ”
I’d like to say - “Read your f00king texts for Christ sake you lazy f00ker!”

I say - “The first clean will cost a bit more because your windows are rather filthy and it will take me longer to get them cleaned to a good standard”
I’d like to say - “You filthy b@stard, you expect me to clean off 5 years of poo for no extra money, you’re having a laugh!”

I say - “No it’s ok, I don’t need to plug into your outside tap, I carry my own de-ionised water”
I’d like to say - “Have you f00king listened to anything I’ve been telling you for last 5 minutes you deaf g1t”

I say - “I’d love one, thank you, 1 sugar in mine”
I’d like to say - “Some custard creams would really slip down nicely with that!”

I say - “Thanks for the 50p tip, you shouldn’t have”
I’d like to say - “You shouldn’t have!”

I say - “You want me to move my van so you can go out now”
I’d like to say - “Could have f00king mentioned it before I f00cking started!”

I say - “I’m really sorry to hear about that”
I’d like to say - “I couldn’t give a poo about your f00king lumbago, or how many times you’ve been to the hospital this week!”

I say - “You’d like to skip this clean because they are not that dirty”
I’d like to say - “I f00king knew you’d be a waster!”

I say - “Just knocking to let you know i’m here”
I’d like to say - “If I came round the back and you had your t1ts out you’d be well p1ssed”

I say - “I’m sorry, but I’m not taking on any more work at the moment”
I’d like to say - “You seem like a complete waste of time!”

I say - “I’m sorry I don’t cover your area anymore”
I’d like to say - “Your a f00king waste of space and your dumped!”
[/

I totally agree with all  of the above and feel the same

Title: Re: What I do say - V - What I’d like to say
Post by: Shane sharples on March 17, 2016, 10:32:08 pm

Awesome  ;D